Calvo Lad Dresses as Daily Mail Reader for Hallowe’en

A CALVERTON BOY has won a Hallowe’en fancy dress competition dressed as a Daily Mail reader, it has been confirmed.

Paul Donaldson, 12, of Collyer Road, Calverton, got the idea from a red-faced shouty man he saw making appalling xenophobic remarks in a local chip shop.

‘I could have gone to the Hallowe’en party as Jason Vorhees from Friday the 13th, Cousin It from The Addams Family or any one of a number of Conservative MPs,’ said Paul.

‘But I’ve come to realise that real monsters actually hide, all the time, in plain sight. You just have to look at the Facebook comments some of them leave. When those poor, desperate people were found in that refrigerated lorry in Essex last week? The hatred on that Daily Mail Facebook page. The hatred.

‘I’m proud of my boy,’ said Nigel Donaldson, Paul’s dad.

‘I’m not saying all Daily Mail readers are capable of the diabolical internal darkness we saw on Facebook last week. I’m sure some readers do have souls. But there comes a point when you have to say to them: ‘Why do you carry on reading this hate rag when a cursory check of any basic facts or data will show you it’s telling you relentless lies on a daily basis? Everything it writes about immigration in particular is just pure fiction designed to radicalise you. You’re so much better than these lies you accept. Always remember there’s love in you.’

‘Still, Paul’s costume was awesome and he deserved the win.’

Tom Denton, 9, from Paddock Close, came second as a Daily Express reader after they ran out of Dracula costumes at Asda.